Since the inception of Parenting Café we have gained enormous pleasure and benefit from the contributions given so generously by parents (and of course grandparents, professional child carers and the children themselves). January marked the two year anniversary of the start of our research and we took some time to look back on what we have learnt. The most memorable contributions have been those that are both funny and useful. So we’ve gathered up some of the best and you’ll find them below. Usually we credit the sources of our quotes but on this occasion we haven’t done so. This is because some of the quotes are reproduced from memory and some were given to us anonymously, but to those of you who shared these gems with us we offer a big thank-you. Boney M made me a better parent! "My sister, who had children long before me, always said she would hum in her head to calm herself down when her boys were pushing her to the edge. When my rather excitable twins came along I developed the idea further and started singing song lyrics very quietly to myself to help keep calm. After some months of experimenting with different songs I identified that Bony M’s ‘Rasputin’ works best. Try it - whenever your children’s behaviour is threatening to get the better of your patience, sing the following lyrics to yourself. I defy anyone not to regain a sense of proportion immediately." Ra Ra Rasputin, lover of the Russian queen
There was a cat that really was gone
Ra Ra Rasputin, Russia's greatest love machine
It was a shame how he carried on
Kitchen Timers Prevent Child Neglect:
"If you want to avoid losing track of what the kids are doing buy a few kitchen timers. They are great for limiting the time the children spend on the computer and X-box etc. You can use them to manage piano practice or homework sessions leaving the children to get on with the task in hand without having a little voice constantly asking 'how long before I can stop'. A kitchen timer can also be useful when you have sent a child to his bedroom for half an hour; set it to go off to remind you to retrieve him on time and thus avoid the guilt of realising he’s been banished all afternoon!"
Puppies Help Me Keep Perspective:
"A friend gave me a great piece of advice for dealing with arguments between my three children. She pointed out that most people find play fighting between the young of other species cute and endearing (think of a tumbling litter of kittens or puppies) As my friend pointed out, David Attenborough has taught us all that through fighting their siblings, animals such as wolf cubs, are learning important skills they will need as adults. So why should our offspring be different, brothers and sister are pre-programmed to fight and by doing so learn how to win or how to recover from losing? I find this thought does help me stand back, and let the children get on with their bickering, without letting it cause me too much grief."
Counting Down Works Wonders:
"When I have to count to ten to keep my temper with my daughters I have learnt to count down rather than up. I learnt this technique in a customer service training course and it works so much better than counting up. It seems to calm my breathing. Also, you have to concentrate a bit harder on the counting and so you gain a better “time out” break from what is going on around you."
Automatic time switches to the rescue:
"We had a terrible time with our first child, our daughter, who was a very early riser. Even at three years old she wanted to get up at 5am and by this time I was pregnant again and on my knees with tiredness. The problem was she was too young to learn to tell the time. So my husband connected her bedside light to an electric timer switch and set it to turn the light on in the morning. We taught our daughter that she could only come in and wake us up when the light came on, and we gradually changed the timing until the light came on at 7am – bliss. The beauty of this idea is that it worked whatever the time of year, even on summer mornings she could still see for herself whether the light was on or off. Also if the light came on when she was still asleep it didn’t wake her like an alarm would."
Wearing Pyjamas Makes Me Invisible: "I have discovered that my children don't bug me so much in the evening if I have changed into my pyjamas. I have no idea why this works, but if I have an early bath, and then come back downstairs dressed ready for bed I get far fewer interruptions along the lines of the 'can I have a sandwich', 'can you help me mend my jeans' or the dreaded 'I need organic, stone-ground Peruvian chilli powder for my cooking lesson tomorrow"'!
Teenagers need bread and isolation:
"The only way to survive living with teenagers in the house is to 1) ensure there is always masses of bread available and 2 )at all times avoid initiating any sort of conversation with them".
Exposed - The Secret Life of the Bogey:
"If you are the owner of a stroppy toddler who fights any attempt to have his or her nose wiped, then try this. Wipe the child’s nose (restraining child if you have to). Then take a great interest in the contents of the hankie, exclaiming at the size and variety of the bogeys collected there. After a short delay, acquiesce to the child’s insistent badgering for you to show him or her the contents of the hankie. Repeat this procedure three or four times, and expect that your child will soon be pestering you to have it’s nose blown often so it can further impress you or amaze itself!"
And of course as usual if you have an even better tip or idea on managing children to create a happier family life then don’t hesitate to use our contact form let us know. |